some very good reasons (now a motivational speaker will call them excuses), I never got the opportunity to go to University and graduate. I do not have time to derive how that came to be. Two things you must note though: I was hungry and I was capable. But I never had the chance. Little did I know that it would create a massive personal blockade especially when it came to my own self-perception.
Power of A Blockade
I have been sharing deeply on this subject of the power of a blockade. One of the scaring things about a blockade is that it can exist and be in operation in your life and yet you are totally oblivious of its power and its function. Any blockade will automatically hinder you from reaching your potential, deploying your purpose and living your life as God intended you to live. One thing should be noted though is that whether there is a blockade or note, God's intention over your life is never altered to accommodate the blockade.
In the previous articles, we have extensively covered three types of a blockade so far that could be operating in your life. These are:
- Mental Blockade
- Spiritual Blockade
- Cultural Blockade
4. Self Perception
In today's article, I want us to examine at length one of the most debilitating of a blockade you can ever experience. It is closer to each of us than we think. Anyone who has victory over this blockade has a great promise to fulfil their potential and reach their God-given purpose. Anyone who does not have mastery over this blockade will always be hindered, regardless of how good they are in any major area of your life.
Self Concept is how we see ourselves. There are three different things about us:
- There is what others think about us...but then how we react or respond to how they think about us is the function of our self-concept
- There is what we think others think about us...but then again that is a function of how healthy our self-concept is, to begin with. If your self-concept is something that is healthy, you wouldn't even venture to make decisions in life depending on what you think others think about you.
- There is what we think about ourselves in total truth and estimation of our capacity, potential, and purpose. This kind of thinking is seldom affected by our failure to measure up to other people's standards.
The Self-Concept Blockade
Perhaps one of the greatest quotes that I have referred to over and over again on this blog is by Carter G. Woodson. Here goes again:
“If you can control a man's thinking you do not have to worry about his action. When you determine what a man shall think you do not have to concern yourself about what he will do. If you make a man feel that he is inferior, you do not have to compel him to accept an inferior status, for he will seek it himself. If you make a man think that he is justly an outcast, you do not have to order him to the back door. He will go without being told; and if there is no back door, his very nature will demand one.”
When I failed to attain a University degree, it sent me to a lifestyle of shrinking back from life. I always sought that which I thought was commensurate to my academic papers, and never dared to venture higher than that. My self-concept told me that I did not deserve much. I saw myself as a second rate citizen of the world who would never amount to anything. If anything, my disposition as a cheerful character was replaced by a profile of a deeply melancholic person who shrunk away from people that he considered better than himself in order that I could be comfortable in life.
Who I am today would not have been possible if the self-concept blockade would have been left to fester in my life. Frankly, this is one of the most potent of them all. It sneaks in on even the best of us. How to get rid of it is one of the most important things we can do with our lives. The unfortunate thing is that you cannot deal with this blockade by swallowing a pill. You cannot deal with this blockade on the first day of asking. In order to solve this blockade, here are some things that you and I must do consistently.
1. Acknowledge its existence
You will not change anything that you do not acknowledge needs to be changed. The man that has an issue with his life must first acknowledge that he does. That is only when he can surrender enough to seek respite. Pride will kill you. If you know that you have a low self-concept about yourself, it is high time that you acknowledged it to yourself and in the same breathe, start seeking help within and around you as suggested in the succeeding points.
2. Affirm yourself
Here is the thing. You will hardly find someone that will affirm you on a daily basis. If that was happening, already your self-concept will be something that will be healthy, and probably you might not be having a self-concept blockade. However, you have you. You are the man staring back at the mirror. Don't just be silent as you look in the mirror. Open your mouth and give the best speech ever. Learn to craft some "power words" that you can speak over yourself.
Mine are as follows:
- "God has said that he will bless me with everything he has, bless and bless and bless. Therefore in blessing, I am blessed and in multiplication, I am multiplied". (Reference to Hebrews 6:14, The Message)
- "Every day, I live a life full of Divine energy and vitality, generating and a heavy dose of powerful inspiration, impacting this world with a message of hope, greatness and abundance"
The trick is to repeat these power words over and over and over again on a daily basis. Consistency is the key. The power words will form a new self-concept in your subconscious and even go a long way in obliterating some self-concept blockades you might be having.
3. Do the very opposite--Do not shrink
I know this sounds weird, but it is a potent way of obliterating a self-concept blockade. When your self-concept is low and you are aware of it, chances are that you tend to shrink from society. One of the most quoted passages in the personal development circles is by one Marriane Williamson, who I am aware is attempting to become the US president some day. In her book, A Return to Love, she said ever so powerfully,
"Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you".
To shrink back from life is to affirm the blockade. Therefore, as much as you can, do not shrink back. It is one of the toughest things you will ever do, but there is a power like that of a seed sprouting out of the ground when you decide not to shrink back.
There are three or four more points, let's handle them in the next article.